Emoting about Emotions: SofC Saturday

I was reluctant to even start writing about this prompt. It’s a sensitive subject for me. Maybe it’s because I emote. I emote with feeling–with emotion. However, I’m not the only one who does it. Yet, there are many times when some of the people around me act as if I’m the only one that does. Sometimes, the people who most seem to go over the deep end about my emoting are the ones I’d just as soon avoid when something strikes them as significant.

The thing about my emotions is they are reactive. Something happens, I react, and then I move rather quickly into thinking mode. I come up with potential solutions or possibilities. I calm down. I don’t carry things with me for very long–at least, not in general. There is no one who wants to solve the dilemmas that brought about that emoting more than I do. I would prefer to have fewer feelings or to at least experience them less intensely.

I try to save the negative emoting for things that are important–people being disrespectful or demanding, for example. I am frustrated by people who call me emotional at the times when I am standing up for myself. Because the reality is, most of the time, I go along with things. I adjust, I adapt, I go with the flow. Sometimes, I do those things even after I’ve emoted a little about how I would appreciate some appreciation. Unfortunately, it seems the more I go with the flow, the more disrespect I encounter.

Not too many people complain about the positive emoting I do. Well, that’s not entirely true. People often appreciate my enthusiasm, my sense of humor, my optimistic attitude. But I think what the real “problem” is that I’m a little intense. When I’m enthusiastic, it’s contagious–usually. And if you feel like joining in, it takes a lot of energy. This isn’t always too much of a problem when the emoting is positive, but I think that maybe when it’s negative, some people are a little intimidated. Maybe, it’s a little scary. (Hopefully, not as scary as the photo on the right.)

Unfortunately, the times when I’m negatively emoting are the times when I most need people on my side. And well, you can imagine how well that goes. But after writing this post this morning, something happened this afternoon that kind of got me going. But I walked away. Totally. I mapped out how I would handle it. I emoted to myself. I didn’t bottle it up so much. I allowed myself to feel the things. I just didn’t share the feelings. And a moment came when I could let it go. I may not even emote to anyone else. I know that the person who triggered the feelings didn’t do it intentionally. By giving myself private emoting time, I came to a new discovery. Also, it helps knowing that this person always has my best interests at heart. Which is more than I can say about some of the other things that sometimes trigger my feelings.

Still, I’m trying to focus on the positive things, and bring all the feelings–the negative and the positive–into a better balance, to conserve my energy for the things that matter more than these moments of unexpected emoting.

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This is part of a weekly prompt from: http://lindaghill.wordpress.com/2014/06/27/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-june-2814/

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15 comments on “Emoting about Emotions: SofC Saturday

  1. “Unexpected emoting” Made me laugh! We’ve all been there too πŸ™‚ Nice post! It is very true what you were describing…an emotion is like a contagion. Nicely put.

  2. I tend to “blow up” more when I’m tired – whether it’s anger or a fit of giggles. Taking a breath before emoting takes practice – I’ve been there… not sure how I accomplished it in the end. Best of luck with your practice, Deborah.
    Thanks for writing about this difficult subject for SoCS. πŸ™‚

    • I think it probably also has something to do with how “trapped” one feels by the situation causing the “emoting.” As I said, what made it easier to deal with yesterday’s situation is that it wasn’t truly threatening in any way. Just hurtful and annoying. That made it easier to deal with than something that affects me at a more fundamental level.

      I have to admit I almost didn’t write. I had to look at the prompt, start the post and not look back. I did draft it and then waited a few hours while we did errands. Came back and added the new “experience,” before hemming and hawing about pushing the publish button. πŸ˜‰

  3. What a great post! Sometimes it’s hard to remember that our own emotions carry over to others just as theirs do to us. I like very much your “private emoting time” I think that’s a good practice. Thanks for sharing.

    • Thanks! The private emoting time is a discovery brought about by the process of doing this prompt. (Damn that Linda, anyway! LOL) And as I said elsewhere, I’m realizing that even emotions can be triaged.

      Another thing I’ve said elsewhere (on several occasions) is that writing is an amazing thing. I don’t think I’d have made the discoveries about a different way to react if it hadn’t been for the prompt. Interesting how that works. πŸ™‚

    • Sometimes, it’s overrated. Sometimes, I get myself into trouble by not really figuring out the negative. Balance is so damn difficult. I think I’m just going to go for being less transparent about what I’m feeling. I’d like to keep people guessing a bit. Throw them off guard. Yeah, somehow I don’t think that will be happening any time soon. πŸ˜‰

  4. Good morning Deborah … so far I have been told I nee to change my domain to comment here ..( DOH!! I don’t have a domain??) then suddenly most of my stuff was in German?? Well hopefully I have sorted those emote making situations, fingers crossed.
    As for your emote experiences I have noticed the same , I , I believe like you are a gentle go with the flow person so when we show any strong feelings or emotions we get jumped on from all direction… WOOAH ! what rattled her chain type of reaction.
    We may not always show our emotions but they are there, they are strong and they run deep! I also people who show little or no emote are not to be trusted.
    Again I hope you get this reply! xxxxxx

    • Even WordPress starts freaking out and speaking in German when you have something to say. haha

      There is definitely merit to what you say. As long as my emotions are the fun side, life of the party, go with the flow, I’m like everyone’s best friend, but have a reaction to something that needs to be changed, and I might as well get out the broom and write my message in the sky.

      Sometimes, it’s just that there are things going on that people want everyone to go with the flow and not rock the boat, and sometimes, there are things worth standing up for.

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